January 2010
20 posts
i found out
i giggle a fuck ton in strip clubs
the women kept tickling me …and laughing at me..im like a lil kid sometimes
it was fun..i spent like 30 dollars..which is extremely good..most was on carl..i just sat there..like this fucking sucks
but it was good to spend time with my friends
and i got hammered
and we went to comos..:)
best quote of the night
dude tht stipper used my t-shirt like toilet paper
Theres no such thing as free Tit Tays
im going to the strip club with Carl tonight
Yea that’s right Carl..the guy that thinks strippers like him
he wants to suit up and go as international businessmen from nova scotia
..i don’t feel like going really..i don’t see the point once you been to 1 strip club you been to them all..i don’t see the point in having tangerine scented tit tays rubbed in my face
i...
guy 1:im not drunk
guy 2:well i am
guy 1: yea i am to
thank you, mlk, for letting me have the day off of...
lind-sey:
comedianwofford:
(via lind-sey)
so basically..thank you popular Black man for being shot and dying so me a white girl doesnt have school…wow ..you racist anti meat eating girl
you, of all people, should know my sarcasm!
well you, of all people, should know mine..and when im joking hahahaha!
here ill do one..thank you mlk for letting me have a day off work..os i can lay around...
2 tags
ihop at 5
my night/ morning
consisted of me going to daains. i wanted to get fucking tanked! we get there play some beer pong its nice and then decide to play vodka pong..put a shot in every cup..BAD IDEA…i didnt feel well. then kashae bangs on a drum and wakes dains mom up and she comes running down stairs screaming at us
that was it for me..killed my buzz..killed me night
so i was all the awesome...
strip club
carl: my first lap dance
me: how was it
carl: awesome..i think she liked me ..her name was peaches
ME: she just wanted your money
carl: she told me if she didnt have a bf she would totally be dtf
me: carl a stripper is the futherest way your going to get from having sex....i mean look at you
carl: your just jealous the peaches likes me
me: omg( put fingers to eyes and shales head)
E: so how scared were you of my death
D: about a 4
E: a 4 what..i almost died..whats worst then my death
D those guardins..there about an 8
E an 8..over me dieing
D yea
E: whats a 10
D..clowns
E clowns are a 10..and im a 4
D. clowns are scary..ill give you a 5
the president is black now..we make decisions
HAHAHAHAHAHAH i laugh at the every time i see it
btw..this just in! you could be making decisions for the past 30 years tracy morgan
but you still make me laugh
harry potter
Stranger: hello stranger
You: hello
Stranger: what are you doing?You: not much…just thinking about life..the hardships and stuff
Stranger: ahh such as?
You: i dunno i have had a messed up life..when i was a baby ..my parents were killed…i mean i barely knew them..i had to go live with my moms sister though..blah
You: shes kinda a wench
Stranger: ahh. sounds sucky.
Stranger: what...
twilight..this is amazing
Stranger: heeey
You: hi
Stranger: what’s up
You: not much
You: just chiling
You: reading some books..cant sleep
Stranger: ya same, I’m tired but can’t seem to get to sleep
You: yea i cant get this girl off my mind
You: or her like douche bag friend wont let me see her…is cool he smeels like a dog
Stranger: awe, is it your gf or just someone you like?
You: well...
You: im having a bad day
Stranger: oh yeah
Stranger: elaborate
You: well im a janitor at a college
You: and ppl are mean to me…but everytime i see a half written problem on the board i can finish it with no problem
Stranger: well someone there appreciates your work i’m sure
You: yea anyway..my best friend is ben affleck
love is
being able to cut the cheese around the girl of your dreams.ha
eric: do you guys have an sleds
nice walmart worker tat was totally doing his job and did not take 20 minutes to find..cause there just everywhere when you need help: nope sold out today
eric: wtf!…ok thanks
walmart..was sold out of sleds..what the hell
Eric: We're both Geminis!
Emily: Go Geminis!
Kait: ...I'm a libra.
Emily and Eric: BITCH!
Eric and I obviously think alike.
Oh my god, I just realized how weird and awkward we all actually are. Tonight was so fucking funny. You guys have to come back over tomorrow so we can do this again. Cuddle partayyy.
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We are all majorly awkward. I love it though. We need to do it again tomorrow. I thought of the perfect movie to bring. Eric will absolutely love it and I'm sure you will too.
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that was seriosuly the funniest days i have ahd in a while!..my ribs hurt from laughter..the faces...THE FACES were the best hahaha
im going to remake the joy- enough to go round song..hahah it will be hilarious
racist
this lady came through my line and was like i demand to watch a kid movie
and i was like ok we got alvin and princess and the from..alvin has already started
but you can watch princess and the frog
then the lady looks me right in the eyes and says thats the damn black disney movie…with all them black ppl making out with frogs and stuff..I REFUSE TO SEE it..i dont need to see dem black...
alil one
i used to be a stand up comedian
what happened?
i fell down
hahah im lame
